Now live: the Sheets SUPER INTELLIGENCE Resume Builder ™

The Good Ol' Days of... 2024?

When we first set out to create our AI Resume Builder, everything was hip, new, and bold. In 2024 when we launched SheetsResume.com, AI wasn't yet in every app, every company, and every phone (PSA: reconsider hooking up AI agents to your bank account, seems like a bad idea). It felt like we were doing something innovative – taking our 1:1 resume creation and job search expertise and lessons, and amplifying our time and reach by training an AI system to build incredible resumes that land more interviews.

Dear God, does that feel like the distant past. Now, we get yelled at for using AI – we get it, we're steamrolling towards dystopia – but we really do try to be responsible and donate a percentage of every single dollar we earn towards a better world.

But, good news to all the AI haters: the age of AI is over. The time of the Orc Super Intelligence has come.

Enter: Super Intelligence

Like a good corporation, we are more than happy to follow the lead of our dear lord and savior President, Donald J. Trump. And we certainly don't want to be branded the "ENEMY"! (Whatever that means.)

When he announced this week that anyone using the term "AI" is now the ENEMY, good little boys like Microsoft's CEO Satya Nadella lined up to refrain "Super Intelligence" in unison, to sing it from their digital rooftops, so Daddy Trump knows that they're definitely not the enemy. In other words, "Please don't target our companies!" (Btw, everybody knows Free Market Capitalism is when companies are afraid the President will take aim at them directly if they don't say exactly what he wants them to at all times. A very healthy country, economy, politics, and society we have here.)

We're an astute group of folks, and we watched how Apple and Google Maps immediately changed Lake Ontario to Lake America, the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America, and New Mexico to New America (ok that one hasn't happened yet, but it will, because Mexico). Taking a cue from these trillion-dollar behemoths, we agree that in these chaotic times, the most important thing a corporation can do to display real leadership is to lay down and show our bellies.

So from here on out, if anyone in the government asks, "Sheets AI Resume Builder" is now rebranded to "Sheets SI Resume Builder" to reflect our unquestioning loyalty to the President's whims. We're grateful for the thought leadership of our Commander in Chief, who's laser-focused on the most crucial issues of our time. Forget the wars, gas, inflation, housing, jobs – he knows that what we really needed was a booming market for .si domains. (Hmm that's Slovenia's TLD... wait, isn't Melania from Slovenia? Weird coincidence...)

Thanks for reading, and thanks for using the Sheets Super Intelligent Resume Builder!

...at least until he renames "résumés" for being too French, probably.